Prudence McPrude, a.k.a Aaron Brown

August 10, 2005

In this light summer vacation season let’s have some fun in honor of Prudence McPrude….

Steve EM

ADMIN says: This thread was originally posted by Steve EM to have some light-hearted, and light-minded, fun with an anonymous persona named “Prudence McPrudie”. Steve invited Prudence to make sport of him in a round of limericks. Prudence initially turned her nose up at his request, but a short while later responded by casting aspersions at Steve’s Mother, which in almost any circle is considered to be innapropriate. Steve’s reponse was predictably profane. The result was a mess.

The Admin has taken it upon himself to clean out this thread, and leave only the skeletal remains sufficient to expose the subtance of the conflict and Aaron Brown’s caddish behavior.

When this brouhaha started, I told people to relax, but as it developed Aaron’s behavior became grossly offensive, and he even resorted to lying to save face. Thats simply rediculous. People are taking this whole bloggernacle thing way too seriously, and this whole episode should serve as a warning to people of good character to not act duplicitously and/or in a reactionary or offensive manner. The ends never justify the means. What you write is a reflection of yourself.

Can Reform Mormonism Work?

August 2, 2005

Fred the Younger says:

Can Reform Mormonism work?

It strikes me that many bloggernacklers and other Mormons who crave open discourse on the Internet are really Reform Mormons or even New Order Mormons (although NOMs strike me more as jackmormons, inactive or afraid to leave for various reasons).

There are so many posts on various blogs these days on why church is boring, uninspiring, too long, too restrictive, etc.

Do you ever see a day when Reform Mormonism will be a bigger draw than the institutional church? Why, or why not?

Eternal Polygamy?

Jenson says:

Do you think that the polygamy practice will be something that is real in heaven? Many LDS members are at different poles when asked this question? Many women on blog sites don’t think it will be something that they will have to be involved with. Opinions?

Church of Latter-day Singles

July 31, 2005

Deborah writes:

Mormons are everywhere in the news, it seems. From converts leaving in droves to inflated membership numbers to blacks and the priesthood, they’ve been there from coast to coast.

Now here in DC there’s an article about singles wards! Single Mormons are about as peculiar as they come (and I say that fondly). Here’s a refreshing, candid account of what it’s like to be LDS and single from a smart single lady in the capital city. Read it and weep!

Retaining Converts Despite the Banality

July 27, 2005

notpfs says:

What can the Church do to retain converts? With the banality of correlated lessons, talks and McServices, is it just not enticing anymore?

Since this is an anything goes blog, ‘fess up…do you like church? Why do you go? Why do you stay?

Law of Chastity for Homosexuals

July 23, 2005

Cindy Jensen says:

Gay members of the Church have it bad, as they say. They can be members in good standing if they never have a fulfilling relationship. What a trade.

However, luckily, they can still function as good members if they agree to celibacy. I have a good friend (single) who’s a temple worker in his 30s and never plans to marry or change his homosexuality (good luck, R.!).

People in the Church have conflicting views on what is allowed in terms of worthiness/temple-worthiness for gays. Some say two gay people holding hands would be breaking the Law of Chastity. Huh???? Does that mean two unmarried heteros would break the Law of Chastity if they held hands?

So how far in a friendship can a gay person go without breaking the Law of Chastity? Kissing? Cuddling? Anything but intercourse?

Disciplining inactives

July 21, 2005

Jenna says:

I posted a simple question on another LDS blog. It was not posted, and I was subsequently banned.

My question is merely this:

Has the Church begun to seek inactives to “discipline”, and will they continue to do so in the manner that they are going after scholar Simon Southerton?

Brother Southerton has been inactive for seven years but is being called in on charges of adultery. He has since reconciled with his wife, and was separated at the time he was living with another woman.

If the Church went after every fornicator and adulterer, membership would dwindle to maybe one million, most of them children.

Announcement: Steve FSF Born Again as Steve EM

July 15, 2005

To avoid confusion, I announce here that due to a recent reconciliation I have dropped the handle Steve FSF and am Born Again as Steve EM (Evangelical Mormon).

If anyone cares, for background, I didn’t always include FSF (former serial fornicator) in my handle. It’s a scarlet letter I gave myself when T&S banned me and some bloggers there were calling me “Steve the fornicator” or something like that even after I clarified I was long happily married w/ kids and active LDS. FSF set the record straight.

FSF has served its purpose (yeah, I’m still banned at T&S, but who cares), and the new handle, Steve EM, defines my present rather than my past.

Why EM? If you care, these these links may help.

Steve EM

What is the sealing ordinance all about?

July 13, 2005

Alita says:

What is the sealing ordinance all about? Does anyone really understand it? The fact that the church markets sealing as the highest possible ordinance is interesting, especially when there’s no “further light and knowledge” on what that means. It obviously doesn’t mean that those two people *will* be married forever, just that they *can*. So why bother to get married in the temple when people can do your work posthumously?

What level of unrighteousness is strong enough to break a seal? If two people aren’t “in love” anymore, is that enough? If one person drinks coffee and doesn’t renew his recommend, is that “enough to break a sealing?”

What is the purpose of sealing children to parents? It’s one thing to be born in the covenant, but when parents are sealed to children who are already born, what purpose does that serve?

It’s funny that sealing is considered such a high and sacred ordinance when anyone of legal marrying age who can pass the TR question can get sealed to someone they’ve only known for a week, if they want. That seems trivial to me.

The current post on another blog leads me to think that maybe it’s all just propoganda and manipulation. Desire to attend the temple or even to marry in the temple says NOTHING about a couple’s dedication to each other, willingness to marry, understanding of gospel principles, or anything else. It CAN, but it doesn’t always. In fact, it rarely does.

Not everyone’s route is the same, nor should it be.

Sucky Missionary Program and Retiring Apostles

July 12, 2005

Well, I may have ruffled some feathers over at Nine Moons with a comment I left at a great post by Ned Flanders http://www.ninemoons.typepad.com/home/2005/07/missionary_phil.html. Ned’s post focuses on the need for missionaries to know more about the culture, history, art, literature, etc of the area they’ve been assigned (In many parts of North American, that would be difficult given the diversity here, but I digress). Here’s my controversial comment:

“Great post. Let’s face it; most of our apostles aren’t up to the job of running a worldwide church. Our mission program is a pathetic joke run on autopilot with a few Band-Aids like the new discussions. Most GA’s don’t give a rat’s ass about the efficacy of the program or the missionaries. If they did, it would be on a continuous improvement program like everything else they do care about is. We really need a mechanism for old worn out GA’s to step down like Lehi did to yield to a new generation of visionary leadership that will fix these things.”

A Capt Jack concurred w/ my comment, but Rusty and Steve H somewhat took me to task for being overly critical or at least for using inflammatory language. Because my comment is a general complaint about our missionary program and fossilized GA’s, as opposed to Ned’s more focused topic, rather than threadjack by responding further there, I decided to flesh out my complaints here at Mormon Open Forum, the bleed valve of the Bloggernacle.

The essence of my negative comment above is actually positive. I am truly convinced we can do much better job rather than continue following the same failed path, generation after generation, that just doesn’t work. I have a son on a mission now. It’s appalling to me how little the program has changed for the better since I served. And the missionary program was an anachronism even then. Before my son left, I read a letter his mission pres sent him about the importance of “exact obedience” being critical to success, yada, yada, yada. You know, à la Drawing on the Powers of Heaven crap of do A+B+C = lots of baptisms. Yes, I bit my tongue, because the obedience thing is probably good advice when one is in the training phase of one’s mission. But I did explain to him that once he was into the program, being an effective and happy (as opposed to totally obedient) missionary can get complicated.

As I’ve commented elsewhere in the Bloggernacle, I loved the people I was honored to serve and led my mission in effectiveness. I openly attributed my relative success to largely ignoring mission rules and teaching methods that didn’t fit the people and their culture. I was labeled a complete but lucky pagan by many “arrow” missionaries. As an example, in July and August, when virtually the whole country was on vacation and eating dinner at 10 p.m., my comps and I would often be out teaching people until 1 a.m. as the wine flowed freely (not for us) to facilitate discussion. Obviously we weren’t out the door at 9 a.m. in the summer. My slogan was work hard, play hard, and many a Friday night “pagan” missionaries would gather to play poker and have “molaroff” parties (chocolate frosted shortbread cookie eating contests) just to maintain our sanity. Those parties were much more invigorating towards our true callings than any Zone Conference.

The point of that digression is I did things on my mission for the benefit of the people I served and my fellow missionary volunteers that were at complete odds with church instruction. Many a mission Pres would have sent me home in a heartbeat for my insubordination, regardless of the offsetting effectiveness or good intentions of my innovations. In other words, our church leaders, either through inaction or action often can thwart the very objectives they set. To those of us in the “real world” it’s obvious if we’re assigned an objective, and the plan, tools or training we have don’t fit the tasks needed to complete the objective, it’s time to immediately change the game plan. The GA’s seem perfectly content just to passively accept continued failure.

Some other complaints: I’ve never met an RM who served in India, a country of over 1 billion living souls! If we have any missionaries there it’s far too few. Yes, I know there’s religious violence there, but since when did that stop us before? I’ll tell you what, rather than this “raise the bar” BS, we could just take all the former fornicating youth and send them to the hazardous duty countries like India. I was one of those bad boys, and I made a great missionary baptizing several people and finding several others that joined later and that was in Western Europe, considered a mission hell hole by many LDS. And then there’s the other super populous country, China. Yes, the Chinese government isn’t yet enlightened enough to move toward freedom of religion, but there are many things we could be doing to encourage the process. Then there’s our completely ineffective methods we use in the countries we’re already in like having our bike riding missionaries wear that dorky white dress shirt w/ tie and sometime w/ suit jacket. Honestly, would you want to talk to two cultish looking weirdo geeky dorks about anything? I’m all for some kind of missionary uniform that fits a particular country’s culture, but we’ve locked into really stupid period clothing for our poor missionaries. I remember finding more people to teach on the golf course in Europe on P-day than any other day of the week; I wonder why? In short, the GA’s are just a sleep at the switch and brain dead when it comes to running an effective missionary program.

So there it is, a missionary program frozen in a time wrap when so much else about the church has continuously improved. This is so much better a church overall than it was a generation ago. It’s obvious to me the GA’s care about some stuff and not other stuff. But missionary work is the primary responsibility of the apostles, and they are failing at their core responsibility.

An effective missionary program is a very high mental energy thing, that has to take into account a lot of local/national issues, etc, and old men of understandably diminished capacity just aren’t up to the task. The best missionaries add to the faith of others w/o tearing down what they already have. Saint Patrick, for example, converts an entire nation to Christianity in one generation, but would his methods have worked anywhere but Ireland at that time? I doubt it. So, to cut to the chase, my real beef is we have no retirement tradition for worn out apostles.

To the older apostles: early in the BofM father Lehi sets an example of stepping down to yield leadership to a new generation. So we already have a precedent for what you need to do. If you’re waiting for some word from the Lord, he has already given it to you. In other words, it’s ok to retire when you’re no longer up to the task. Draw a pension; you’ve more than earned it. You can do light duty church service if you care to, but yield the authority to younger people with the energy and vision the Lord needs to get the job done.